your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Randomize