I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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