I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
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