It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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