This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Randomize
