What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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