As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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