so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
