brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
