I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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