can we get nightvision for the apartment?
No stitches, just platelets and will power
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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