No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
