Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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