I could have mohawked her pubes.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I wear drunk well.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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