nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
