Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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