guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
