nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
