we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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