ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Your tits are I can't wait for
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
so much tequila, so little girl.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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