You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Randomize
