I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize