Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
