wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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