I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
