Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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