My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
