I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
whose ass print is on the piano?
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
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