So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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