Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
