nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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