Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Randomize