Your mouth is God's brothel.
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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