How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
