i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
