Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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