after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry š¬
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far Iām loving being divorced. :-)
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a āfireplaceā station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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