bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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