It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
