We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Randomize
