drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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