the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
