Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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