It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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