grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Randomize
