Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
