Having a random hookup so left but love u
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Randomize
