ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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