physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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