maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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