bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
