3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
tequila makes me forget i have legs
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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