let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
So vagazzling was a success
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
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